Who Is To Blame?

Who is more responsible for the teenage pregnancies? Are the teenage girls to blame who get pregnant in their teens or are the teenage boys who make them pregnant are the problem? Is it the peer pressure from the friends the culprit? How about the parents who are too busy to talk to their kids and be with them when they need the parents to help emotionally. Yes, you are right, my next question is - are the teachers to blame who do not explain the dangers of promiscuity to the teenage girls and the teenage boys? Well, most schools might point the finger to the government for not promoting the education that should be targeted to the teenage years.

Obviously, if we give a thought to each of the questions above, almost none of us can be absolved of the rampant teenage pregnancies these days. Since we all have played a role, at some point in our lives, we all are to share the blame equally.

Unfortunately, the person who suffers the most from a teenage pregnancy is the teenage girl herself! Many a times she is not aware of what she might end up with when she goes easy with life. Not only does a teenage pregnancy ruins the young mother emotionally, but can cause irreversible harm to her body ruining the chances of her becoming a mother when she really wants to when she grows up. There are a lot of reasons a young girl should abstain from having sex and avoiding teenage pregnancy is one of the most compelling ones.

A young teenage mother, first of all may not be able to have a full term pregnancy, even if she wants to. There is a big chance of the baby taking birth prematurely or the pregnancy getting terminated midway. These are big emotional challenges for even the mature grown up moms - they just become overwhelmingly complex for a teenage girl. At this point, we have not even got to what happens to the baby who comes into this world totally unwelcome.

But why does a teenage girl gets pregnant at this age? A teenage girl cannot become pregnant by herself! Therefore, the boy who is responsible needs to understand the immense harm he is doing to the girl for the fun that does not even last more than a few minutes for him! Unfortunately, the boy is the one who escapes almost unscathed from the trauma he causes to a teenage girl.

Yes, sometimes the girls ask for it! I think it is not because they really want to get pregnant but to "prove themselves" and to mitigate the peer pressure from the friends who are often bragging about the number of boys they have slept with! The unfortunate fact is that most of these friends bragging are simply lying. The boy friends often take the girl for a ride by showering love which the girls mistakes it to be for her when the real love is for an opportunity to sleep with her.

You might wonder how could the parents have helped a teenage girl from becoming pregnant or a teenage boy from making someone pregnant when these teenagers are so "spoiled", "out of control" and "just a pain" in the parents' lives? The fact is the parents often are the cause of the problem that makes the kids revolt. The kids are smart, intelligent people who would be the owners of this world tomorrow. If the parents think they would start talking to their kids when the kids are like 13 or 14, they are highly mistaken. You cannot become friends when you want to. The parents need to be the real friends of their kids right from the time the kids are born. The endless fun that you have by just making your toddler giggle, creates the bond that lasts for ever. This bond is nurtured and made stronger every time you be with your kids, play with them, be by their side when they get hurt or need help, encouraging them to do good all the time. If you, as the parents, kept on postponing having the time with your kids when they were small, you would be in a big surprise to know that it is too late by the time they become teens. The teenagers often try to find their own answers, and do not realize that most of the time those answers are wrong as there is no one to guide them.

The sad part is, most of these parents in their teenage years, made the same mistakes their teenage girls and teenage boys make now. These parents of today used to be against their own parents. Now when they are the parents they want their kids to be in their control. Even when they knew what they missed from their own parents, they do not want to provide that guidance and love to their own kids when it is their time to set the things right! Dear teenagers, if you are reading this, trust me, it is a good idea to make sure you set a better example for your kids when you grow up!

Very often, the parents simply rely on the schools to give the education about abstinence to their children as if they have no role to play. On the other hand, the grown ups in many families breakup and remarry or have affairs - which means they had been sleeping with someone other than their spouse secretly. These same parents get mad when their kids do the same! Again, my teenage friends, it is time to break this vicious cycle and you can do it by setting a better example for your kids. I always hold the parents, and I am one of them, to be more responsible.

The schools, of course, shrug off their responsibilities often citing the lack of "funds" from the government. The teachers, at the end of the day, are employees who have to work according to the instructions they receive from the higher ups. A few teachers might not be doing what they are asked to, but such examples are rare. I have a very high regards for the teachers as most of the ones I know personally are doing a great service to the mankind.

The government is always broken. With the Obama administration coming in, my hopes went up, but realizing the agenda of the Congress and the Senate, it seems President Obama by himself cannot really do much. Again, a lesson for the young people that they should choose their representatives who would work for the people and not for themselves. The politicians of today are simply trying to cheat and scare people for political gains.

In a nutshell, the responsibility of preventing a teenage pregnancy lies with each one of us. When a young teenage life gets subjected to the pressures of motherhood and choosing between the life of her own and her baby's, trust me it is extremely traumatizing for the young girl. It is also traumatizing for the family as a whole. Let us, as young girls, not become a victim of a false peer pressure. Having sex is not the only way to prove oneself. As parents and teachers, let us be more responsible towards our kids. We need to understand them more than they need to understand us. The kids would realize this only when they become parents. We just dont need to preach abstinence before marriage, we need to practice abstinence with people other than our spouses. If we all follow our responsibilities, the menace of teenage pregnancy would be in control soon.

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